Synodality. What is That?

The mental health and well-being of children have become a concern during this pandemic as their formative years are disrupted, causing some of them to suffer from anxiety and depression. To learn how parents can help their children, Catholics@Home podcast recently conversed with two guests who're experienced in this area. First guest, Madeleine Yong who is a play therapist and co-creator of Power of Play says that children generally don't understand the COVID-19 pandemic. Power of Play is an organisation that offers clinical sessions to individuals and groups of children. She explains, "Certain children have perceived fears such as fearing their parents may contract the virus and pass away leaving them orphans. Some children suffer stress as a result of not being able to cope with online learning. All these stresses may cause behavioural problems to appear. " According to Yong, school closure, isolation, not having friends and boredom are some of the reasons that causes children to act out. She says, "There're two things that could happen - either the child will scream and yell, or keep quiet. However, a child that is quiet does not necessarily mean that they're obedient. Instead, it could mean that the child has shut down due to feelings of being overwhelmed." Yong reminded that a child with behavioural problems should not be perceived as a defiant or a rebel, instead it could be cry for help. "We need to go beyond punishing the child because when a child is acting out, e.g. hitting, kicking, yelling, blaming, demanding, controlling, fighting or running away, these are behaviours that the child cannot articulate." To cope with such a situation, Yong advised parents to learn to regulate, i.e. the ability to manage big emotions by staying present, in other words, learn to relax. She shares that this can be done by taking deep breaths, praying, listening to music, contemplation, silence, meditation and through movements (exercise). "When we manage our emotions, we'll be seen as co-regulators and you'll be able to help your child manage their emotions. The child will then learn from their parents to relax themselves. "Many children are insecure and they need someone to listen to them. Unless you know what your child is struggling with, you won't be able to respond from your heart," she says. Second guest on the podcast, Jamel Badaoui, says that in terms of mental well-being, it is important to promote positivity as much as possible. "Even though the pandemic is challenging, in the long term the situation is only temporary and therefore it is important to make the best of the situation. Essentially the child and parent must be placed in a position where they can embrace their challenges," says Badaoui who is an educator leader with over 12 years of experience holding middle and senior leadership roles across the United Kingdom, Singapore and Malaysia. He is currently the Deputy Head, Primary of an international group school. "It is not particularly healthy to worry about things that are beyond your control. Instead, limit your scope of worry to things within your control," says Badaoui who also emphasised the importance of having feelings of gratitude. Having two young children of his own, he says that parents have a huge responsibility to be role models for their children especially in modelling the right kind of attitude and perspective. Badaoui says that parents and children must have structure in their lives such as setting aside time for reflection and meditation. "Spending time with children is the key. You'll need to take an interest in your child's interest and spend time with them playing puzzles, reading books, eating chocolate, dancing, etc. Latch on to that and make that the highlight of your home environment," he says. Fr Clarence Devadass, advisor of Catholics@Home podcast summarised three aspects that could help preserve the mental health and well-being of children and their families, i.e. making time for each other, offering positive reinforcements and listening to one another. "A practical suggestion is to have meals together where family members can be present to one another," he says. To view this podcast, go to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-A_kllnM18